Every day we are surrounded with emotions, both our own and other people’s. The secret is learning to deal with the true emotion, the emotion under the one we are witnessing. Learning to recognize the veils of emotion that protect our true feelings can be very difficult.
In most cases the emotion we see is a veil to cover the true one. We use it as a defense mechanism to avoid discovery of the true emotion. Many times we don’t even know the veil has been created, as it quickly becomes a safety net to hide in, making us feel safe.
Two of the most common veils found with individuals that have lost a Loved One are Grief and Helplessness. Although these are true emotions, they can become veils for other things.
-The Veil of Grief is a coverall. This one is amazing, we can sweep any emotion under this veil. When a new emotion pops up, we think, “Oh, I’m just grieving.” The veil is usually only covering one emotion and that is “Fear”. The fear of being forced into change, of a new life, and fear of dealing with our emotions.
-The veil of Helplessness is a blinder. This is a veil of clever disguise. It is used to hide different kinds of emotions we have discovered. We may not know what to do with these emotions so we just use our blinder. If you feel trapped in your life, job, or emotional place, the veil of “Helplessness” comes out.
Why Do We Use A Veil?
Veils are used for several reasons other than a defence mechanism. They can be a subconscious reaction in our brain, one we have without thinking.
-With a veil we can gain the sympathy of others.
-With a veil we can defer dealing with our true emotions.
-With a veil we can defer dealing with reality.
How Can I Remove The Veil?
Removing the veil is all about facing your emotions. You have to recognize the veil and acknowledge the emotion. You can do that by asking yourself the following questions:
-What am I afraid of?
-Am I just expected to feel this way?
-What don’t I want to deal with?
These questions will help you see emotions for what they are, not more or less. They will show you what you are blocking, emotions or situations. They will help you start to deal with emotions that you have put on the back burners. These questions will help you take a step in the right direction to heal.
You want to find peace with your emotions, this can help you move forward. You want to learn to deal with your emotions, not bury them back in the corner of your mind or heart. Remember, things become heavier the longer you carry them.
